Is This Motherhood?

Is this motherhood?

My kid is the smartest. And he’s just so funny. It’s not because I’m biased, right?

I want to be with him all the time, but I also keep sneaking away to try and quietly eat chips around the corner.

I have all the laundry done but what day is it?

I feel nervous to see my son. Butterflies. Every time.

How long will I get to love this child?... and is bedtime soon? Six hours to go?! How is that possible?

It’s just poop, it’s not that gross.

Do you think that person over there wants to see a picture of my kid?  He’s so cute, they do I bet.

When I think about the first day I met you I want to cry. Or I do cry; but usually only if I’m in a really public place where it’s weird to cry.

Is this motherhood?

I hope my smart, funny son is coping with being back home. I hope his mom understands that he’s experiencing trauma now and that tantrums are probably for a reason. I mean maybe they’re not for any reason other than that he’s little and little kids are kinda bananas.

I hope he grows up knowing his value and that making good choices matters.

I hope he doesn’t miss me too much.

I hope he has friends in school.

I hope I get to see him again one day.

Am I still a mom?

I hope he forgets me, but not what I taught him.

Is this (foster) motherhood?